What does the Bible teach about
marriage and divorce?
In God created man male and female. First, God formed man (Adam) from the dust of the ground. After God breathed his Spirit into him, he came to life. The woman (Eve) fashioned God from a rib of man. Although male and female are different, both are made in God's image. In principle, both are considered equal individuals before God.
God created man and woman so that they can be clearly identified by their specific physical characteristics. In addition, God gave man and woman special qualities and strengths. They should use this to serve one another in love and to complement one another.
God made the man the head of the family. This means that God gave man the responsibility to care for his wife and children, to protect them from harm and to make conscientious decisions for their good. The woman should be the man's help in God's plan and stand by him with advice and wisdom. At the same time she should recognize his divinely appointed function as head of the family and trustingly submit to his leadership. Together, man and woman should form a unit (literally: "one flesh").
The Bible calls this becoming one marriage. The marital union between a man and his wife should, by God's will, last for life. It is also a symbol of the relationship between God and us humans. God's commandments should enable men and women to live harmoniously together and protect them from quarrels and conflicts. At the same time, marriage between man and should be the basis for family and the upbringing of children. Other forms of family and relationships are not permitted and are not recognized by God.
Then as now, a marriage is usually associated with a ceremonial celebration, in which two people say yes to each other in front of witnesses, and thus give the promise to love their spouse and to remain faithful to them for a lifetime. The actual marriage is usually preceded by an engagement, in which two people announce their decision to commit themselves to one another.
Through man's rebellion against his Creator, God's perfect order for life and thus also for marriage was more and more destroyed. Meanwhile, casual partnerships, same-sex marriages, prostitution, and other forms of sexual relations contrary to God's will are becoming more and more the norm. In Europe and the United States in particular, this development is being pushed further and further by business, the state and the media. More and more churches are also supporting this trend, for example by blessing same-sex couples. In doing so, they ignore the biblical commandment of marriage and arbitrarily disregard God's will....
The consequences of man's turning away from God's original order are above all painful relationship experiences, broken families, disruption or loss of natural gender identity and the emergence and spread of various diseases, including various venereal diseases, from which many people die every year. The number of divorces has been increasing for decades, particularly in western industrialized countries.
Jesus expressly points out that the marriage bond between two people whom God has joined should not be separated by people. Therefore, God allows remarriage as a result of divorce only under very specific circumstances:
1.
....when one spouse has been sexually unfaithful to the other. In such a case, God gives the betrayed partner the right to separate and reunite without committing a sin, since the marriage bond has already been broken by the other partner's infidelity.
2.
....when an unbelieving person leaves their believing partner or enters into a new relationship with someone else. In this case, too, a Christian is no longer bound to the unbelieving partner.
3.
....if the partner dies.
Basically, however, God is not pleased when people get divorced. In a few cases - for example in the case of abuse or physical or mental violence by a partner - temporary or permanent physical separation may be necessary. Before a husband and wife consider divorce, it is essential to seek spiritual help from a church or Christian marriage counselor. After a quarrel, husband and wife should seek peace and reconciliation with each other. If both partners sincerely seek God's help and are willing to follow God's direction, all difficulties can be overcome and the marriage can be preserved.
The Bible makes it clear that love is not a feeling or a whim, but a choice; namely the decision to look for the good for one's fellow human beings and thus also for one's own spouse at all times. While the initially strong emotions come and go during the infatuation phase, the responsibility that people assume for one another by saying yes is a lifelong responsibility before God. As such, true love is not primarily expressed in how people feel about each other, but in how they treat each other, regardless of their feelings. God wants to help married couples to grow more and more in their love for each other day by day and to overcome all the challenges that arise in everyday life together.
The Bible commands people who are already believers to marry as a matter of principle “in the Lord”. This means that a single Christian can only marry another Christian who expressly professes Jesus and obeys his commandments. Faith in God is the basis for a happy marriage.
Since marriage is intended for life, the decision for a partner should not be taken lightly, but should be well considered. Ideally, husband and wife should let God show them their future marriage partner, since God is the one who knows best which people are compatible with each other.
Those who obey God's commandments regarding marriage will have God's blessings on their relationship.
Genesis 2,20-25